Achieving a deep intimate connection requires a willingness to share intimate knowledge. Intimacy involves developing a trust where you feel safe and valued to express yourself without feeling judged. It’s about being in the present with another person sometimes not just by physical contact but also through exploring each other’s mind, observing body language and even communicating without words.
In the last post An Easy To Understand Intimacy Definition we looked at what intimacy actually means. This post will highlight communication and discuss an excellent book that will definitely help you to work on building intimacy in your relationship.
Do You Know Your Partner’s Love Language?
Communication is vital in a marriage. It’s a two way process, that many couples find difficult. There’s nothing worse than talking and not feeling that you’re being listened to and understood. This too often can result in divorce. If you don’t know how to communicate effectively it can be learnt.
Gary Chapman has many years of experience as a marriage counselor he is also the author of The 5 Languages Of Love: The Secret To Love That Lasts, Chapman identifies five love languages and suggests that everyone has a primary and secondary love language.
The five love languages are:-
- Words of Affirmation
- Quality Time
- Receiving Gifts
- Acts of Service
- Physical Touch
Chapman highlights that by observing how your partner expresses love and paying attention to what they complain about the most can help you to discover their primary and secondary emotional love languages.
By using the preferred language of your partner to demonstrate love will help to improve communications between you. Chapman uses his background in Linguistics to explain that by not knowing about this vital information, it’s like partners speaking two different languages and not being able to understand each other, feeling awkward and frustrated.
The 5 Languages Of Love: The Secret To Love That Lasts can help you to determine the emotional love languages for your partner and also your own. The book includes real life examples from Chapmans clients and also questions that you will need to answer to help you and your partner through this process. Chapman believes that by not relying on your native language and learning a secondary language, the language of your partner, you will have the keys to a long lasting loving marriage.
You can purchase The 5 Languages Of Love: The Secret To Love That Lasts here. (We will receive a small commission if you do decide to purchase this book through this link.)
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